it's cofee time, world!

Forgive me for not sharing my exciting news with you earlier...I'm going to be a Missionary Barista! Yes, that's right...some of you might be thinking that I made up this position, seeing as I have a heart for missions and being a barista is a dream of mine, but you'd be wrong-o. God's just cool like that--hand-crafting opportunities specific for each one of us! Thank you for loving me THIS much, Lord! :)

What opportunities have surprised and excited you lately?

Simply

I'm smiling. And not because I'm particularly happy, nothing extraordinarily grand happened today. In fact, I have shed plenty of tears just this afternoon over some pretty major changes that are happening in my world, good changes, but hard ones none the less. You know why I'm smiling even as the tears fall? Because lately I've had some great encounters with my Maker.

The ugly truth is that the Lord has been revealing sin in my life. Things like selfishness, judgements that I cast so easily upon others, my impure thoughts about those whom I'm called to love and my casual attitude towards worship, just to name a few. And, the other day He completely convicted me about the pity that I feel towards others--people don't need my pity, they need love.

The prayer of my heart is that my Father would break my heart for that which breaks His. That He would purify my heart, words, thoughts and deeds so that I will be a better, more pure example of Christ to my community. I've been praying for Him to increase and me to decrease. I want to love Him with an all consuming love. I pray that I will boldly let Love live in me, shine through me.

Want to know a little secret? My passion is ministering to women, and it both excites and terrifies me to think of speaking into the lives of women. That's a huge honor and one which I don't even scoff at for a moment. And then I become overwhelmed; I have no business taking on such a responsibility. You probably know what's coming next...the loving rebuke of my Abba when He reminds me, yet again, that it's not about me.

"He must increase, but I must decrease." -John 3:30

Keep Calm and Carry On

Hiya! I have loads on my mind this morning, but will do my best to keep this post from becoming a novel. Plus, I cannot write about everything that's on my mind, a girl's got to have her secrets, right?

This weekend I was reminded that things can change in the blink of an eye, literally. I was in a car accident--I'll spare you all the details, but both cars were smashed right up. I was in the back seat, right behind the driver--we were hit on the driver's side. Once I realized what was going on and that everyone in the car was okay I opened my door to examine the damage. You know what? There wasn't a single scratch, dent or ding on my door. Not one! It really struck me, I just couldn't get over it! Not only had the Lord kept me safe, but he didn't even allow my armor, (in this case my door), to be touched! And in that moment the Lord reminded me that He's got huge plans in store for me, that He's got my life and my days. Teach me to number my days, oh Lord, that I may present to You a heart of wisdom (Ps. 90:12). The Lord really used this accident as a way for me to draw closer to Him, to press into His goodness. And just like those moments with Him under beautiful stary nights His whisper was loud and clear, I LOVE YOU.

My favorite shoes are my red Toms. I'd seriously wear them everyday if they matched everything and were considered "professional." They're comfortable and fit my style to a tee, (define that as you will). Anyway, I remember looking at my shoes right before the accident; once we stopped the top of my head was pressed into the driver's seat and when I opened my eyes they were the first things I saw. "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!" (Rom. 10:15). I'm not talking about my shoes here, I'm talking about my two little feet. Where are they willing to go? To the ends of the earth? And, are they happily skipping, running, jumping to take the good news to the people around them everyday?

Where are your beautiful feet taking you?

Splinter

How do you feel about me, Lord? I closed my eyes as I silently asked my Abba this question while cruising at an altitude of 36,000 feet. For a while He was silent, waiting, I believe, for me to still my thoughts, prepare my heart and quiet my soul. After what seemed like forever, but in reality was probably about 30 seconds, He began to flash visions through my mind. He allowed me to relive some of my favorite recent memories with Him--brilliant starry nights; breathtaking shooting stars; standing on majestic mountaintops taking in the beauty of His creation--and as I was reveling in these memories He whispered truth of His love and adoration towards me. He was reminding me that I am more precious in His sight than all of these things. Tears were streaming down my cheeks faster than I could brush them away.

And then, He brought my earthly father, my daddy, to my mind, and a memory that I haven't thought of in a very long time. When I was about 4 year old I went on a trip with my mom and her family to visit some relatives in Michigan. My dad didn't go with us. I was playing on the outside deck with some of my cousins and got a splinter in my right heal. Uncle Brucie will take that out for you. No way! I wanted my daddy. He was the only one who knew how to take my splinters out. Uncle Brucie is a daddy, too. You won't feel a thing. It didn't matter who he was, he wasn't my daddy. He didn't know how to do it like my daddy. And, no matter how much they reasoned with me about needing to take that splinter out, I refused. He's wasn't my daddy.

I'm still like this today. My daddy does things better than anyone else can. I call him up even though he lives 500 miles away and simply cannot help me in most situations. I love you more than even your daddy, my love! I care about you more purely and deeply than he can. I want to be your #1. Allow me to work on those splinters in your soul. Those lies that you have believed, those curses you have received, those harsh words you have harbored. Receive My love like you receive his. Call on Me first. 

In those last precious moments with my loving Abba this morning he reminded me that He has given me my dreams and desires, atually imprinted them upon my heart. "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart" ~Ps. 37:4. I mustn't forget the first part of that verse: delight yourself in the Lord. John 15:7 promises that if I remain in Him and His words remain in me that I can ask anything and it will be given to me. Pretty big promise, but I must do my part...remain in Him...delight in Him...

My prayer is that I will truly abide in my Abba, take delight in Him and trust Him with my most intimate dreams, wishes and desires, especially those that seem silly or impossible...

slow and easy

I live in the #1 / #2 place to live in America.
No really, it was actually ranked one of those last year in money magazine.
It's a great place, with a great view of the mountains.

I love jammin' to my tunes, mainly Hillsong United, as I run or ride with the windows down.
(Sorry, Need,  I still love you guys...)
People drive, on average, about 3 mi/hr under the speed limit.
I love it!
There's no rush to race through life.
In fact, I'd really describe this community as carefree, go with the flow.

It dawned on me the other day that while I enjoy this life, it should in no way reflect my attitude towards serving my Father.
I need to serve and love with an urgency.
People are dying who have never heard about Jesus.
People are still worshiping idols, hopeless, lost.
I know where I'm going, but that's not enough.
That can't be enough.
God desires that people from every tongue, tribe and nation will worship Him, will know Him intimately.

I know that I'm in this beautiful city for a reason.
These are the people that I am to minister to at this time, to love.
I tend to be so selfish, focusing on my own plans, desires and wants.
I am often overcome by my hurts and disappointments without even considering the hurts and disappointments of others.

My prayer is that as I fall more in love with my Maker I will become a better reflection of Him.
That I will love others and notice their needs before my own.
That I will worship in Spirit and Truth.
And, ultimately, that I will practice what I preach.

Breath in me Your life
Til Your love overtakes me.
Open up my eyes
Let me see You more clearly.
Falling on my knees
Til I love like You love
Like You love me
I love You.
~Bones by Hillsong United

Blessings,

kosmo

The purpose of the Church is worship. Secondary only to worship is missions. Why do we have missions? In order that peoples from every tongue, nation and tribe will worship the name of the Lord.

This video moves me to tears every time I watch it.

I love how God has uniquely crafted each culture.

Language.

Dance.

Celebrations.

How beautiful the day will be when we all come together before the throne, completing the true worship that God so desires.

After this I looked and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb...

-Revelation 7:9

Does your heart beat for the nations?

stay within the lines

Parameters. I'm tired of them!

I've spent most of my life trying to please everyone around me.

Right down to the very way I make my bed!

I'm the one who has boxed myself into this, well...boxed thinking.

I look around at all of these adventurous men and women,

doing mighty work.

Making mistakes...yes, but making impact all the while.

I've really noticed a complacent attitude in my prayer life lately.

Wow! That's hard to admit.

God's tired of my "perfect" prayers.

He wants the raw me, offering meaningful prayers without all the fluff and spiritualization.

He's been teaching me to push the envelope, if you will.

Quitting my job.

Selling my house.

Moving across the country.

And now, He's asking me to trust him with my heart's desires and dreams.

Let go of the control that I think I have, that I don't really have anyway.

Some years ago the Lord impressed extraordinary upon my heart.

You know what? I've had a lot of trouble believing that He has this in store for me.

He's been reminding me that these words were indeed from Him.

And it's now time to step up and believe and receive.

That's right.

He's telling me it's okay for me to receive.
Thank you, sweet Jesus.

Isn't it amazing how the Father uses people, music, nature, art, etc. for His purposes.

I love the heart, vision, mission of this group.

I'm completely blown away with their "realness," honesty and compassion for serving the Lord!

I can't think of anything more attractive than reckless pursuit of the Lord!

aftermath

God Bless!