Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Tears

Tears are funny little things. No two tears are exactly the same, nor do they all serve the same purpose. Oh, let's see...there's tears of sadness, anger, self-pity, happiness, excitement, overwhelming joy, love, regret, fear, laughter, the list goes on. I use them all, and I use them often. I once heard a friend say, "I've got emotions and I'm not afraid to use them." Ha! Me too.

So, my world has been utterly and completely rocked this past month. My wildest dreams are coming true; God has really been showing off lately. Remember that leap of faith that I took back in July--you know, the one where I quit my job with no new job possibility? It was scary, exciting, and more than anything it was completely necessary. Wow, was my faith ever strengthened. Out of the blue, for me, not God, I received an email from an organization I love asking if I'd be interested in a job with them. Are you kidding? Yes! The next week I had a phone interview, (I'm guessing that's what it was anyway), the following week they flew me out to Colorado to check out the job and town, and last Tuesday I was officially offered the job. And, two of the girls in the office have a roommate who is moving out in October, which just so happens to be the month I'll be starting--God hooked up my dream job and my room and board. You know what I did? Prayed. Yep, that's it. I didn't even know the position was available. So, now I'll be closer to my parents, doing a job that I'm so excited about for an organization that I love, and returning "home."

Of course, all of this is great! I've shed many tears of joy over God's faithfulness. It always makes me sad when I get surprised over God's faithfulness...He's God. He's faithful all the time. But, nonetheless, here I am completely blown away and humbled. But, for every tear of joy has come two tears of sadness, fear, uncertainty. Saying good-bye is hard. I've lived in Tuscaloosa for over 13 years. I have amazing friends. I belong to a God fearing, life-giving church body. I know and am known here. It's hard. I'm letting go of so much good, so many memories, but I know that in all of this letting go I'm letting God. Letting God take control. Letting God show me the way. Letting God use me as He sees fit. Letting go of good in order for God to reveal great.


"...You have collected all my tears in Your bottle. You have recorded each one in Your book."
~Psalm 56:8

Blessings!